XYZ

About himself (in his Orkut profile)

football is my life & i m in love with it....
want 2 live my whole life playing n gossiping.....

Abhipreet Das wrote:

Recently, I read a news somewhere that the rate of cases of rape, molestation, and outraging modesty of girls was rising at an alarming pace in the otherwise peaceful town of Raibareily. The police were still on the lookout for suspects, I think I have talked to the culprit though. I am pretty sure that this has to be a direct fallout of XYZ shifting there. This trait of unending and unparalleled desperation was evident in him since his childhood, and it was not difficult to predict that he shall grow on to become the next Rasputin, whom he proudly claimed to be his idol, the one person he wanted to emulate. As far as I am concerned, I am pretty sure that XYZ shall make Rasputin proud, and I won't be surprised if he goes a few steps ahead.
When he was in BIT Mesra, I once had the chance to talk to him, and the conversation was so very predictable, as he lamented of the lack of girls in his college, as he told me how he suitably interjected his daily life with hand-exercises after regular intervals (he claimed to hold a record of 15 times in a day), and as he went on to narrate his fantasies. If and when XYZ's future wife reads this, be warned, you are into something you won't be able to imagine, you shall be tortured beyond despair, and you won't be able to turn to anyone. I am told that he shared such ideas with his brother, who would usually add his own innovations in the whole thing. Mind you, together they formed the most formidable of men to have graced this earth, so one fine day if they set out to fulfill their desires, girls, you are in some trouble.
Back in school days, people like Abhiket, Pranshu (you know the group I am pointing to) were so terrified by his presence that they sought refuge elsewhere, and would make it a point to never remain alone with this inhuman beast.

I think that all you guys would concur that XYZ was a man of foresight. As I rewind to early 2002, as many of us were counting the days in Vidyapith, we had this tradition of getting our slam-books filled by our friends (about them, people reserved the first/last pages for the special ones). It was as early as then that XYZ had written backbiting, groupism, gangism as the things he hated the most. While we were at loggerheads at what that could possibly mean, XYZ casually smiled at us and our ignorance, our immaturity. Years later, this is the thing most of us are best at, as we ridicule one and all, in the subject's absence. This is what I have done wherever I have gone to meet people from RKM. This is what happens to me behind my back in Mumbai and elsewhere these days. This is what this blog is dedicated to. As it is, people in my wing in IIT (those not from RKM) now use these terms more frequently than Snehil or Shubh. Similarly, XYZ's discovery of the number system as a measure of someone's levami or pakami is historic, and is being followed far and wide by people who have at most heard of this soul.
I had an opportunity to talk to XYZ a few days back, and as I was trying to make him understand this contribution of his, he retorted, "I still hate these things, yaar". I am definite that he must have also started to chew his aerial chewing-gum after that, easily the most powerful and innovative matter-of-fact expression I have come across.

XYZ is the most casual of all people I know, and whatever happens, he takes it very lightly. Let me describe an incident to you to get the message across. I think you would remember him as the flagbearer of all neeramish, or vegetarian, people in Vidyapith. Soyabean, rajma, paneer or papad, XYZ had them all, and had them in abundance. His thali would usually be half filled with the sabji and the remaining would be stuffed with rice. I am not sure if he thought that the food might get over or what, he always reached Dining Hall before time, and would usually leave only curry for others, helping himself with whatever solid he could gather from the sabji handi. I am told that XYZ's movement was taken as the first bell of Dining Hall during +2 days. Now, it once happened that a few people with good impression got a duty to serve some random monk who had come to visit Vidyapith. As luck would have it, XYZ was not a part of the team, and to make matters worse, the food was far more delicious than the usual stuff, which the monks did not touch. So, these good-impression guys helped themselves, and returned content and happy enough to go hungry for a long, long time. When they spotted him, they thought that it was time to get a sneak-peek at some million-dollar expressions. So they related the whole story, of what all they had, of how delicious the food was, of how much they ate. XYZ listened for a while, and then remarked casually, "Aaj dining hall mei papad ka sabji bhi bahut accha bana tha, bahut khaye", as he got up and started chewing the aerial gum once again.

XYZ was also the most cricket crazy person I have seen around, and his exploits with the ball are the stuff legends are made of. He was the fastest bowler anyone from our class has ever faced, I have taken accounts from Snehil, Anupam and Vibhor as far as this is concerned. You hit him for a boundary and he shall come charging to you round the wickets, and you shall have no option but to get away from the line of the ball. I believe the most tormented was Sushant, as he started batting from outside the pitch when XYZ was bowling. While he was also a handy bat, he was fun to watch. Whatever shot he may have hit, the ball might have gone for a four or a six or he may have got out, he always looked at the bat as if there was a hole there, there always was something wrong with the willow. Perhaps the bowler to have got him out the maximum number of times would be Keshav, and every time Keshav celebrated, his smile was always followed by a dog-like howling as XYZ would very casually hit something to his arm, an art that was taught by Jackie Chan himself. He meted this treatment to anyone and everyone who irritated him.

These days, he has had to curb his natural instincts, and is very frustrated by the life. Dude, you've gotta play cricket, stay as casual as you are, and you shall be happy.